Just like many countries around the world, Spain has been hit hard by COVID-19. Although I'm from the UK, at the moment I am living in Barcelona and here we have recently moved to 'stage one' of the lockdown exit strategy. This basically means that more shops, beach bars and terraces are open with limited capacity and that we are allowed to meet in groups of up to ten people.
However, when I went for a walk yesterday it seemed that so many people had forgotten that the virus is still here! I understand that we are all excited to see our friends and families after so long but I saw people hugging, shaking hands, kissing on the cheek, not wearing masks, playing drinking games and drinking from the same cup, I could go on! This just seemed so stupid to me because there is still such a high risk of contracting the virus and of course passing it on to someone else! By the way, I am not saying that these people are stupid, I'm saying that their actions are stupid. Also, it wasn't only the locals, I'm referring to people from all over the world, including from my country!
So, that got me thinking about some common ways to express 'stupidity' in English.
Also, I thought it would be interesting to look at how we can talk about stupidity without being overly offensive, as this is an important communicative skill!
So, join me and let's explore some ways to talk about stupidity!
#1 No Einstein
Most people would agree that Albert Einstein was an incredibly intelligent man. As a theoretical physicist he developed the theory of relatively and gave so much to the world of science. Also, that hair!
So, if somebody is 'no Einstein' then they are the opposite of incredibly intelligent, in fact, they have probably done something very idiotic!
Example:
I can't believe that he bought those shoes, they are three sizes to small for him and he tried them on in the shop, now his feet are hurting! He's really no Einstein.
#2 Doesn't have much between the ears
This expression is a good one because it's not too serious. It implies that the person you are referring to doesn't have much of a brain and therefore is not very smart or does stupid things.
True story: When I was travelling around Thailand in 2017, I rented a motorbike even though I had never ridden one before, also I didn't know the roads and it was raining at the time. Inevitably, I crashed within ten minutes and injured my leg, I was in pain for the rest of my trip and I had to pay a huge fine!
That was a pretty stupid decision with an awful outcome so, I could say that on that day, I didn't have much between my ears!
#3 Have the IQ of a ...
This is a fun one because you can adapt it how you like, just make sure to follow the structure and then add whichever word you feel is best at the end.
Of course, your noun at the end of this expression will be something that doesn't have an IQ or has a very low IQ.
My favourite is wet tea bag!
Although in the past I have heard: mug, door and even goldfish.
Example:
How can he have done something so stupid? He must have the IQ of a goldfish!
#4 Not the sharpest tool in the shed.
There are many variations of this idiom but they basically all mean the same thing. If someone has done something stupid or is perceived to be stupid but you don't want to call them an idiot directly, then you can use these expressions so as not to sound too cruel or nasty.
For example:
'He's not the sharpest tool in the shed'
Sounds much nicer than...
'He's an absolute idiot'
Other variations include:
Not the brightest bulb in the box.
Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
Not the brightest star in the sky.
Not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree.
True story: I remember when I was about eleven years old, my 'friend' cut the netting on a football goal and when his Dad found out that the goal had been damaged, the boy decided to lie and blame it on me. His Dad believed the lie and said that I 'wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed' when it was actually his own son who had damaged it and then lied. Tut tut - But I'm clearly not bitter about it, haha ;)
#5 As thick as two short planks
If you're not sure, a plank is a piece of wood which is often quite thick in terms of size. Short planks look thicker, and if you have two of them stacked on top of each other, then they are even thicker!
It means that someone is incredibly stupid.
I would argue that you would only use this idiom if you were intending to really offend the person who you are aiming it towards as it sounds quite harsh!
Often we shorten the expression to 'as thick as a plank'
Example:
Can you believe that he put his hand into the lions cage? He must be as thick as a plank!
I hope you enjoyed learning these idioms, there will be more here next Friday and a blog post about grammar on Tuesday!
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Stay safe and don't do anything stupid!
Take care
Your English teacher,
Mitch
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